Wednesday, May 27, 2015


This little face.  Sometimes I think the kids notice when I'm not on top of my game and secretly plan to test me more.  I have at least one who does, but I'm beginning to think all four do.

Life has been crazy.  I've made it that way.  It's a busy season on the ranch, but I've also been busy with photography (and trying to learn more programs to get better at photography), keeping kids alive, waiting for my sister to have her baby (she did!), and looking at a summer filled with "stuff" while trying not to have a panic attack.

And...well, this little one inside is sucking the life out of me.  In a good, good way.

I haven't been blogging.  I've barely been gramming.  And, I'm lucky if I get a weekly photo taken of the kids these days.

My meal planning has gone out the window.  I have a call-back list a mile long (yet I cannot seem to find an extra five minutes to even pick up the phone - and honestly, when I do have an extra five, I can't imagine picking up the phone).  And, I've lost every ounce of patience that had slowly built up inside.

Life is good.  Yet, I'm in a slump.  90% of me thinks this will get better once I cross over into the glorious 2nd trimester.  But that 10% is afraid it won't.

I don't do it all by any means, but sometimes I just have those moments/days/weeks where it seems like I just barely get by.

I feel like the blog hasn't been well planned or very thought-provoking.  I haven't kept up with any of the blogs/friends I typically do.  I feel like we've lived on sandwiches and pizza for weeks.  And, my kids might tell you that I've "lost it" more than I care to admit.

I know things will get better.  I know that I naturally put too much pressure on myself...even for the tiniest of things.

But there you have it :)  Why I haven't been blogging...why it may continue this way for a bit.  I'm not sad.  I'm not even crying out for help.  Just letting you in on the crazy and looking forward to regaining composure.


  1. I've concluded there is no composure as a mother. There's surviving, and then there's really really surviving. I love you and your blog. Thanks for being real and catching us up!!

  2. Ha! Great post! Welcome to the real world of mothering! I laughed when I came to the part about meal planning. We have had three plus nights in a row with, "Hey Xavier, can you run to Meatheads and grab us some dinner?" I feel guilty for .... about three seconds! Life just seems to have those cycles, cooking a lot and not cooking much at our house, there are so many days when I thank Jesus we have some decent fast food places to go to for meals. I wonder how moms in the olden days survived with big families, and kids with special needs, without a Chipotle nearby! I remember seeing the movie "Cheaper by the Dozen" around the time our fifth baby came along; that Mom had a cook AND a fix it man! I wonder who decided moms didn't need that help anymore. Finding easier ways, and shortcuts in meal prep s just the reality of family life for me, so often! Love that you are keeping it real! That's the best mothering of all!

  3. Oh my gosh. I'd be on the floor at that pace! I am also a firm believer that my children can smell weakness. They were especially squirrely after my surgery when I couldn't do more than yell...which I hate because I'm trying so hard not to be a yeller! Praying you stay rested and enjoy all the fun in this time!

  4. Been there my friend! Sometimes i have to remind myself, they are just kids...calm down, they are just kids, LOL. I do think they like to test your limits, when they're laying in bed awake, is that what they're thinking? What sort of mischief they can get in to? Haha. J/K, sort of. <3